I read a post today on Coco and Crème that reminded me of a post I read on A Belle in Brooklyn a few weeks ago. Both posts address yet another disturbing beauty trend, not being exotic enough. I’m not going to get on my soap box and preach about the souls of black folk being killed slowly by self-hatred and assimilation, I just wanted share.
For the record, I’m just “regular black” and I’d have it no other way.
http://cocoandcreme.com/2010/11/not-exotic-enough-are-black-women-falling-out-of-the-spotlight/
http://www.abelleinbrooklyn.com/home/2010/9/1/visual-aesthetics.html
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
He’s Only Interested In One Thing Because She’s Not That Interesting
Jozen from UnitIGetMarried makes me laugh sometimes, but this morning I was cheering from the sidelines yelling “Tell’em why you mad, son! Get’em Get’em.” Click the title to read his original post, He’s Only Interested In One Thing Because She’s Not That Interesting. I took out my favorite quotes below and continued with my co-signing.
“Just like men have to face the fact that they’re not God’s gift just because they don’t put their hands on a woman, women have to understand, what else do they bring to the table? I hear women brag a lot about how they have their stuff together. What the hell does that have to do with what a man wants? Make a man laugh. Make a man think. Make a man speak.”
I’ve always preached about not letting superficial things define you, like a degree, a job, designer labels or in this case your cookie jar. So many people can’t answer the question, “So what do you like to do?” What the hell happened to hobbies? Hanging out with friends and partying is not a hobby. People who are funny are usually smart and perceptive, people who make people think have knowledge and life experiences (i.e. hobbies), people who make people speak usually have something to say.
“Every time a man doesn’t get the woman he wants he wonders, what was he missing. What could he have done to get the girl who turned him down? Then he applies it to the next woman. He’s himself all the while, but he definitely wants to know how he can improve.
Women, on the other hand….man, a lot of you all just think if a man didn’t want you, there was something wrong with him. He just didn’t see how interesting you are.”
Jozen if a man doesn’t want ME, something is wrong with HIM. For those who lack personality this one’s for you. I’m awesome! (kidding, but not really).
“It’s time for women to understand, s*x may be on top of a man’s list of priorities, but it for d*mn sure isn’t the whole list. We have a list of things we want in a woman too. Some of us want a woman who can cook. Some of us want a woman who knows how to look good. Some of us want a woman who hits the gym. But all of us want a woman who is interesting.”
I concur, but that goes for the bruvas too.
I’ve always preached about not letting superficial things define you, like a degree, a job, designer labels or in this case your cookie jar. So many people can’t answer the question, “So what do you like to do?” What the hell happened to hobbies? Hanging out with friends and partying is not a hobby. People who are funny are usually smart and perceptive, people who make people think have knowledge and life experiences (i.e. hobbies), people who make people speak usually have something to say.
“Every time a man doesn’t get the woman he wants he wonders, what was he missing. What could he have done to get the girl who turned him down? Then he applies it to the next woman. He’s himself all the while, but he definitely wants to know how he can improve.
Women, on the other hand….man, a lot of you all just think if a man didn’t want you, there was something wrong with him. He just didn’t see how interesting you are.”
Jozen if a man doesn’t want ME, something is wrong with HIM. For those who lack personality this one’s for you. I’m awesome! (kidding, but not really).
“It’s time for women to understand, s*x may be on top of a man’s list of priorities, but it for d*mn sure isn’t the whole list. We have a list of things we want in a woman too. Some of us want a woman who can cook. Some of us want a woman who knows how to look good. Some of us want a woman who hits the gym. But all of us want a woman who is interesting.”
I concur, but that goes for the bruvas too.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Tyler Perry, Doesn't Like Black Men Either?
I haven’t seen Tyler Perry’s For Colored Girls and I won’t die if never see it. The reviews have been mixed, but if you’ve seen one Tyler Perry movie you’ve seen ‘me all, right? They all concern a strong, but hurt black woman, abused and down trodden or uber-successful and cold. For Colored Girls adds a dose of male bashing too, so I’ve read. Bravo Tyler! N*ggas is crazy too.
I find that I encounter some “damaged goods” too; brothas who just play all kind of games. “I wait to see if she’s gonna offer to pay on a first date.” If you ask me out, I ain’t paying and I’m not going to pretend to pay either. If the date has two parts I’ll offer on the second like pay for the popcorn or whatever. “I didn’t leave you a message just to see if you were gonna call me back anyway.” If you didn’t leave a message so you obliviously did want anything, right? “You didn’t make me dinner. You just selfish.” Do we have the same last name? If not, I feel obligated to cook for you. “I only mentioned her name to see if you cared about me.” Games all games. Insecure, much?
I think bruva’s (DMV accent) are confused and taken aback when they meet a real grown ass woman without any psychological problems. Gender roles are seriously muddled in the black community and I think it has to do with so many fatherless people who even lack strong male role models. Some of these sistas are straight trippin too sellin coochie to the highest bidder. They just lack self-esteem. We are a people who have lost a sense of pride, self-worth and dignity. We don’t love ourselves so how can WE love EACH OTHER? How did we get to the point where ladies can’t be ladies and gentlemen can’t be gentlemen?
Tyler Perry did a good thing if you exposed the some of the diseases that ail the male black population. I believe they were cheaters, rapists, abusers etc, but in my opinion those are sick, hurt people too. WE all just need ONE big HUG.
Monday, November 15, 2010
10 Things Every Woman Should Own
Star stylist Nicole Chavez listed 10 Things Every Woman Must Own for Instyle magazine a while ago. Click the title to take you to the link. Her picks are listed below as well as my humble opinion.
1. Black blazer or a nice sturdy black cardigan. Cardigans adds a sophistocated vibe, real Michelle O.
2. Red Flats or your signature color. I like red, but I love purple.
3. Striped Shirt or a button down white one or a black cotton turtle neck it depends on your overall "look." Striped says sport classic, but black say chic.
4. Little Black Dress (LBD) AGREED!
5. Opaque tights I live in these during the winter. Plus I don't have to shave my legs. Bonus!
6. Oversize watch I'm feeling the rose gold look.
7. Classic Trench I've got three of 'em.
8. Flared jeans or whatever looks best on you. I live in skinnies, but bootcuts are more classic.
9. Leopard print scarf Animal prints never go out of style. Ever.
10. Statement necklace or earrings or bracelet. I'm an earring person the bigger the better.
My picks are below.
1. Black blazer or a nice sturdy black cardigan. Cardigans adds a sophistocated vibe, real Michelle O.
2. Red Flats or your signature color. I like red, but I love purple.
3. Striped Shirt or a button down white one or a black cotton turtle neck it depends on your overall "look." Striped says sport classic, but black say chic.
4. Little Black Dress (LBD) AGREED!
5. Opaque tights I live in these during the winter. Plus I don't have to shave my legs. Bonus!
6. Oversize watch I'm feeling the rose gold look.
7. Classic Trench I've got three of 'em.
8. Flared jeans or whatever looks best on you. I live in skinnies, but bootcuts are more classic.
9. Leopard print scarf Animal prints never go out of style. Ever.
10. Statement necklace or earrings or bracelet. I'm an earring person the bigger the better.
My picks are below.
Friday, November 12, 2010
DangerousNegro.com = Dope Site
I learned of this site a while ago, but I decided to revisit it today and WOW. In fashion speak, "I die." I luv the message and the designs. The purple "Goal Digger" t-shirt is perfect for me, but sold-out.
The following have been added to my Christmas Wishlist.
and because I still rocks with Barack...
Rudeness is for Losers
I’ve come to the conclusion that some people just like to fight and argue. It’s their hobby, their story for the day, it’s just who they are. Some people like to be insanely rude for no reason. I find this quite sad. I hear people recant stories with pride about how they had to “go off” on lady who cut in front of them and how they, the baddest b*tch, will tell it like it is and put anyone in his place. But what do they really get out of it? Are these people really “winners” in life? No.Recently, a homely co-worker sent me an e-mail in regard to a project. Later at the printer she asked me about it. “Did you get my e-mail?” I hate e-mails, but that’s another post. The e-mail was about a project that I wasn’t project manager on, but I knew where to get the information she needed.
“So and so is the project manager, but the information should be on Web site.”
“It’s not on the Web site. Somebody told me you did the project.”
Now she needed the sponsorship information for an awards ceremony I helped with in September. I’m not responsible for the details I just helped with set-up and registration, but I did know that every event program book lists the sponsors, duh. The information was and still is on the Web site too.
I said, “That’s so and so, but,” and she turned on her heels and walked away without a word. I was going to go and get a copy of the program book, but did I? Hells no and now she doesn’t have an ally in me at work. And she didn’t get what she needed. Now I could have just gotten the program book, but as a new employee I thought it was important for her to know who the project manager was in case she had additional questions.
Wednesday, I went to exchange a net book purchased online at the Best Buy. “It’s a 15% restocking fee,” said the customer service rep at the store, smugly. I called customer service that morning and they informed me of the procedure, but didn’t mention a restocking fee. I could have turned into Tasha Mack. Instead calmly, I told her what the customer service rep told me. She went on with all these questions, she was training a new employee I guess, but her attitude expressed that she wanted a “story” from me. Long story short, customer service at Best Buy sucks, but I left with my full purchase price and Ms. Thang didn’t get her rise. I think my calm demeanor surprised her and she had to waive the fee.
Lesson, get what you want/need first then go ape sh*t.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
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